Metal Meredith

All Dressed Up with Tivo at the Ready

I am not a fan of the Oscars or any awards show for that matter. I am always uncomfortable with the forced banter. Anxiety grips me while I worry that the producer will cue the music in an attempt to cut an acceptance speech short like they did with Frank Sinatra. When an actor gets up and uses his time to go off script and campaign for goats for Malaysia, I cringe. I do, however, like to look at the outfits, see who looked good or bad.

I used to watch the red carpet interviews until the decided to get the most ignorant non-stars to do the honors. After the required “Who are you wearing”, they inevitably toss in some “So, do you have any words for Andy Griffith after losing his good friend Don Knotts?” The actors and actresses, not wanting to look heartless, smile and bend their eyes sympathetically as they deliver a heartfelt message to the ET cameras. If it were anyone of us ‘normal people’, we would have rolled our eyes into next week.

My guess is that it became not fun anymore after 9/11, when everyone was forced to look somber and wear simple pant suits because pomp wasn’t so hip when so many people lost their lives. And I understand. But now, we are back to the sass and anti-reality that is Hollywood. It is what gets us through the sad reality of our own lives. Instead of asking people what they think of the war in Iraq or the latest 3rd world country weather related tragedy, let us ask the celebrities to commit to be either on the side of Jen or Angelina. If you pick one, you cannot be friends with the other.

Think Jen got shafted? I am sorry, no more jaunts to the Italian Villa of George Clooney. Think Brad was jusitifed? Again sorry, any possible cameos on future projects of previous “Friends” cast members is strictly forbidden. After, let’s make everyone wear an armband or ribbon with designated colors of what sex Angie and Brad’s baby will be.

THAT would be a much more interesting Red Carpet scenerio.

All this hate really leaves me with one choice to get my entire Oscar dish, the internet. Since I have written this far on this unbelievably uninteresting topic, I will continue with a confession that you may have already guessed:

I. Love. Celebrity. Gossip.

In fact, I subscribe to many online sites that update on a daily basis, if not several times a day with new photos and dish. Just in case ou are closeted as I once was, I am listing a group of my favorite sites for you to enjoy while you TIVO the Oscars like me and fast forward through everyone but John Stewart.

Be warned that these are not PG sites, there might be some naughty words and pictures. It is the paparazzi afterall.

Pink is the New Blog
Defamer
Smart
Perez Hilton
The Superficial
Popsugar

If you have a little softspot like me for pop culture, you will get your fill by clicking on the links above, promise.